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Perfunctory Life, A Poem from my Confessions
When sadness comesIt drives away passionsLife becomes perfunctoryRestless no more—is my heartListless—it barely beatsNever stirs—for more impassioned featsWhen melodies operatic do soundSlight inner wakes do compoundBut heart laden—brokenIsn’t worth torturing—for tokenGestures given only in hasteWhen time and loveForever remain chaste.
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Feeling Better | Thoughts
Feeling Better Anxiety I am feeling better than I did yesterday. Some anxiety and restlessness remain from yesterday, but it feels more manageable. Morning Plans Shifted Originally, I was thinking to visit my dad in memory care this morning and take him out for breakfast, but I think yesterday’s outing with him exhausted me so…
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Answer to God & Auras (Prodromes)| Sorry | Low Mood Recovery
Shower Forced myself into the shower today. While in there, I was in my head a lot and thought about my last post. About, feeling scared of when God shows up in my life and feeling the fear of it happening again. Saints, and many people, feel a very secure attachment to God’s love and…
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God & Auras (Prodromes) | Walk | Anxiety
Morning Woke up at 0400. Read morning prayers at 0500. Took a morning nap which is crazy since I had 36 mg of Concerta, but I guess I was tired. Walk Took a walk to my favourite park to get outside and try to calm my nerves. Auras (Prodromes) I have someone I write a…
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Forgiven Debts | Success Re-evaluation | Workout
Forgiven Debts I learned the Our Father prayer when I was very young. It is probably the only one I know without anyone else saying it with me at the same time. Never really thought about it, in-depth, until a friend shared his meditations on the prayer. Today, I read over the part about how…
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A Beautiful Mind…Despite Brokenness
After giving birth to my second daughter, I developed post-partum thyroiditis (later changed to Grave’s Disease). Due to economic and other reasons, I was unable to get care for that condition so I suffered for almost 2 years with it. At the time, I also had Bipolar 1 and PTSD, only I was unaware of…
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My Poetry | Luciano, A Funeral Dirge
Morning Prayer (Lauds) Prayers This morning, I woke up at 0400 and wasted a little time. Then, I decided to open the Universalis app and read morning prayers. As I read through the hymns, psalms, and canticles, some dormant part of me began to reawaken. Poetry A long time ago, I had a very popular…
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Afternoon Thoughts | Lay Your Hands on Me
Afternoon Thoughts Got some stuff done. Not enough. I was a little disorganised today. Going to mass and then I’m going to do a short evening workout with my daughter. I’m going to try to stay up until 8 or 9 tonight since I’ve been going to bed too early. Tomorrow Morning When I wake…
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Thoughts | Aging | Relationships
Early Morning Woke up at 0200 but I went to sleep around 6 pm. Was feeling really tired yesterday evening. Ordered some groceries and got my laundry done. Was very lazy and didn’t do anything else that was productive. Direct Sunlight is Cruel Rapidly Aging I am seriously rapidly aging. I looked at myself on…
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Status Update | 2026 Goals | 8 Dimensions of Wellness
Intro The content below is actually on its own page at the top of this blog, but I thought I’d repost it today, along with a few thoughts. Goals I haven’t lost any weight since April 23 as I sort of took a detour on the diet. But, I am maintaining and should drop some…
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Beautiful Morning
0300 Woke up at 0300 which was well before my 0400 alarm. I had night sweats and I felt gross and realised I would just be uncomfortable if I stayed in bed so I got up and started the day. YouTube Scrolled on YouTube. Tried to watch a dumb movie about a dysfunctional relationship. Decided…
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Is the Body a Weight & Punishment on the Soul?
Seneca After taking a brief rest, I started reading the Stoic, Seneca’s letter to Lucilius number 65-“On the first cause.” Seneca begins the letter reminding Lucilius that Stoic philosophers say there are two things in the universe that are the source of all things: cause and matter. However, he says that Aristotle and Plato have…
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Healthy Choices| My Confirmation Saint
Healthy Choices I didn’t exercise today, but I did a lot of household chores. I also made soy milk, bread, and some creole pinto beans with spinach and brown jasmine rice. Because AI says my posts need photos: Spirituality I had some temptations and inner trials, but I leaned on God a lot more than…
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Confession | Mass| Feeling Better
Confession Went to confession and I think it helped to talk about mania recovery. Mass Stayed for mass and said prayers and felt happier. Feeling Better I’m feeling better. I think it helped to go there and be spiritual for a little bit. Picked up some ice cream and plan to eat that for dinner.