Mania Recovery: Not Giving in to Despair

Mania recovery can be emotionally intense. I feel like I lost control of myself, to a degree, and I feel like I made some choices that I, otherwise, would not make. Like turning down a good job.

I also feel sad that my healthy living journal became ground zero for my manic episode, and I feel exhausted in my soul.

Giving in to depression is something I cannot afford to do right now. I don’t want to feel depressed. I don’t want to despair.

I’m frustrated that I haven’t worked on my book about psychosis in motherhood in almost a month now. I don’t even think I remember all of the research I’ve done for the first chapter. It feels like starting over from zero.

I could go down these paths of despair, but instead, I’m going to acknowledge these feelings and disappointments without fully giving up on getting back on track. I know I need to make time for rest and recovery, but I also think that by doing little chores during my short bursts of energy will help me recover more quickly.

So, today, I will clean my room and make a healthy meal. My concentration isn’t the best right now, but I could probably go over the 47 pages of notes I made for chapter one of my book.

Exercise, today, will likely include household chores, unless I am feeling more energetic. It would feel like torture, but I could probably do a 20 minute yoga video, in addition to the cleaning. If not 20 minutes, then maybe a 10 minute video on YouTube will be the smarter choice given my short attention span. I want to feel like I’ve done something healthy today—not jut cleaning.

After writing this post, I’m going to open the Laudate app and do a prayer or two. Then, I’ll practice Latin sounds and alphabet using the Quizlet app. I didn’t do either yesterday.

Concluding Thoughts

Choosing not to dwell on my suffering is helping me to feel like I can keep moving forward. I don’t want to feel stuck in the post-mania pit of despair.

Thank you for reading and following. I hope you keep moving forward towards your goals and better days.