I woke up at 0400. Had a big medium roast coffee. Skipped the Concerta because I’m recovering from mania.

I wasn’t going to write on my birthday, but after watching the movie, Moon, I decided to come down from the moon and join the land of the living-with my family when they wake up.

I have to take my youngest to class as she is still hesitant to drive there on her own. At noon, we are going to sit in my oldest daughter’s vehicle while she takes her lunch at the veterinary clinic. The girls wanted to do something “fun” for my birthday. But, I told them I need OdinSleep sessions and I just want an easy day. They are getting me a tiramisu cake. Delicious but not-so-great for lactose intolerance. Have supplement to help with that. Update: Oldest daughter says she has a half day and will come over after work. Yay!

This Christmas, I sent the song “Snowman” by Sia to a friend. I think it hurt more than it helped which made me feel sad as I didn’t intend that to be the response. Explained that the song intensely reminded me of a parody poem I wrote in high school about two cow patties with the girl one issuing a challenge to the boy one. I’m listening to it now and will post the lyrics below.

I have had some scenarios this morning, but just like how I chose uncertainty when it comes to work and finances, I am choosing uncertainty with meeting the right person in the future-if that is what God wants. On my own, I am fine. I learned this being a single mom without much of a support system. I’m stronger than I give myself credit for.

I feel rested and at peace. I think maybe the OdinSleep helped. It was lights out early in the evening.

Well, I will share the song lyrics now.

Snowman by Sia

Don’t cry, snowman, not in front of me
Who’ll catch your tears if you can’t catch me, darling?
If you can’t catch me, darling
Don’t cry, snowman, don’t leave me this way
A puddle of water can’t hold me close, baby
Can’t hold me close, baby

I want you to know that I’m never leaving
‘Cause I’m Mrs. Snow, ’til death we’ll be freezing, yeah
You are my home, my home for all seasons
So come on, let’s go

Let’s go below zero, and hide from the sun
I’ll love you forever, where we’ll have some fun
Yes, let’s hit the North Pole and live happily
Please don’t cry no tears now, it’s Christmas, baby

My snowman and me, eh
My snowman and me
Baby

Don’t cry, snowman, don’t you fear the sun
Who’ll carry me without legs to run, honey?
Without legs to run, honey
Don’t cry, snowman, don’t you shed a tear
Who’ll hear my secrets if you don’t have ears, baby?
If you don’t have ears, baby

I want you to know that I’m never leaving
‘Cause I’m Mrs. Snow, ’til death we’ll be freezing, yeah
You are my home, my home for all seasons
So come on, let’s go

Let’s go below zero, and hide from the sun
I’ll love you forever, where we’ll have some fun
Yes, let’s hit the North Pole and live happily
Please don’t cry no tears now, it’s Christmas, baby

My snowman and me, eh
My snowman and me
Baby

Update: After writing this post, I messaged the friend I sent it to last Christmas. There are all kinds of love in this world. With some people, you share only your good seasons. With few, you share all seasons. And that is ok.