Yesterday, I was very productive in researching for my book on maternal psychosis. I felt pretty proud of that as I’ve been struggling with my concentration. I didn’t ride my spin bike though. I really should have as I think it could have helped me process some weird feelings that crept up later in the afternoon.

About weird feelings: I don’t have time for them. I have already spent a year dealing with other uncomfortable feelings, and I’d like a break from the introspection. So, weird feelings will have to bother me later. Whatever I need to do to distract myself in a healthy way is what I’m going to do.

This morning, I was pretty lazy. My alarm went off at 0400 and I decided to sleep in until 0500. Last night, I went to bed early, but I was still tired this morning. Shuffled to the kitchen. Made a giant mug of coffee. Snuggled on the couch and sort of watched a Lifetime movie on YouTube. Mostly, I thought about my weird feelings and decided I need to start my day and push through this uncomfortable feeling.

Recently, I started binge eating after having lost some weight. Spent some time thinking about why, and now I feel like I can get back on track. I need to lose weight as I miss being athletic and fit. I think it helps me mentally to be physically fit. Yesterday, I ate one meal. That probably isn’t too healthy, but I wasn’t very hungry anyway.

Due to concentration issues, I haven’t read as many books as I’d like, but I’m currently reading Seneca’s stoic letters to Lucilius. They are enjoyable because I can read them in short bursts. I might write a post about some of them.

Today, I’m supposed to spend time with both of my daughters; we are going to play tennis if the weather is nice. We aren’t expert tennis players. We just hit the ball to each other. I’m actually pretty terrible at tennis, but it is a nice way to spend time with the girls so I hope we can do that today.

I’m going to get some more research done for the maternal psychosis book, and I’m learning how to use Affinity software to make journals and planners. I read that Adobe InDesign is pretty much what is needed to create them, but Affinity is a free option. Free appeals to me right now.

If, for some reason, we don’t play tennis, I’ll commit to riding the spin bike and do some upper body resistance training. I really need to create a plan and stick to it.

Originally, I had planned to write this post after reading and getting some research done, but I decided to write in hopes that it will wake up my brain some more.

For now, I need to take Gumbo, my twelve-year-old chihuahua, out and feed him and the fish.The vacuum robot is lost and rambling around my bedroom so I need to help it find its way home. Will definitely push through these weird feelings and get stuff done.

Thanks for reading, and for my next post, I’ll try to write about something I’ve read.